Claudia's Mystery Admirer
by mcpon14
Summary: Claudia (narrator). Oneshot. Alternate universe (slightly).


"Who is Bugs Bunnyyy?" asked Kristy while peering over my shoulder. "Three y's?"

"Whoa! Miss Nosy," I retorted as I clapped shut my laptop and whirled to face her. "It's none of your business."

"It's better than coming in here and having the first thing I see being your butt sticking out from under the bed," she chuckled backing away a little smiling.

I grabbed a pencil from the holder on my desk and feint-flung it at her. Her eyes got big and she yanked back. I ended the arc of the feint-throw with handing her the pencil. "Here. This usually goes on your ear."

"Thanks," she remarked sarcastically, grabbed the pencil and put it in her ear. "But how come you don't want anybody to know about this person?" She said person with air-quotes.

I snarled to myself. She kept probing.

"Does Stacey know about him?"

I was silent. Her prying was getting on my nerves a bit.

"I'm worried Claud. What if this person is dangerous. How did you even get in touch with him?"

"He lives in Stoneybrook; Janine checked the IP address for me," I caved finally giving in to the continual questioning.

Then suddenly there was a rush of wind as Stacey, Mary Anne, Mallory and Jessi hurried in. Jessi walked in on her hands, knees bent with her feet dangling.

"Ow," Jessi reacted after Stacey accidentally stepped on her right hand which caused her to bring down her feet and stand upright.

Everybody soon arranged themselves in their usual sitting places.

"What time does your computer say?" Kristy asked me with exaggerated innocence.

"Check my clock. It's closer," I sniped.

It said 5:28.

We sat in uncomfortable silence until 5:30 popped up.

"This meeting of the Babysitters Club will now come to order," declared Kristy.

RIIINNNGGG.

Stacey grabbed it and the conversation on her end was drowned out for me as I became rapt up in what Kristy had been saying earlier.

Before I knew it, the meeting was over and everybody left. All I remember from it was that I had a sitting job with the Rodowskys on Sunday and that Kristy had let out that I was being courted on Facebook by an anonymous person. I was too tired to deny it so everybody now believes an online romance is brewing between a certain Bugs Bunnyyy and I.

Then I heard two sharp knocks on my door. I opened it to reveal Janine holding a bouquet of roses tied at the stems.

"Here," she said flatly thrusting them in my hands then left.

I took them to my bed and read the note:

To Claudia

From Bugs Bunnyyy

I flipped my laptop open. My screen still had my Facebook page on it. I had a message from Bugs Bunnyyy indicated on the top-right corner. Then we entered into an online conversation:

BB: Did you get the flowers?

Me: ys. thei wir luvlie

BB: Now you have to do something for me.

Me: whait ?

BB: Meet me at Pizza Express, tonight. I'll be in costume. (So you'll recognize me.)

Me: Ub. kno thxx i caygnt b ot late. skoool nit.

BB: Why not?

Me: gist kon't

He quickly logged off after that. I was taken aback since it was the first time that he's been brusque with me.

* * *

During lunch the next day, Kristy was making her usual jokes about our hot lunch.

"I bet they are serving us Troy Parker today," commented Kristy as she stirred her cheese enchiladas.

"Ew. Ew. Ew." We all chorused.

"Who is Troy Parker?" asked Stacey.

"Some kid that's been suspended for a long time," informed Kristy.

At that, we fell back to eating.

"Hmmm," Kristy continued. "Actually, it looks more like Bugs Bunnyyy."

"What's that supposed to mean," I responded hotly.

"I meant that this slop is just as mysterious as he is," she explained.

I sighed.

"You know Claud. He could be any one of these guys," Stacey remarked sneaking peeks at the various tables around us.

"Hmmm. I bet it's Alan," Kristy surmised.

"I bet it's Cokie," inputted Mary Anne a little exasperated.

"Okay. Let's work on this together. Tell Mal and Jessi about it," Kristy declared with resolve.

I sighed inwardly cloistering into myself by focusing on finishing my lunch. I tuned out the rest of the discussion.

* * *

When I came home I saw my favorite red sweater laying prominently on my bed - at least the top half of it. The bottom half had been haphazardly sheared off judging by the looks of the ragged hem. I gasped. I looked around trying to find the missing piece.

"Claudia?" It was Janine. "Can you enter my bedroom please. I have a very important question to ask you."

"Coming," I yelled.

When I stepped out of my door frame I saw a trail of M&Ms leading to her room. I hurriedly gathered them as I reached her door.

"Janine!" I scolded. "Why do you -?"

I was cut off by the sight before me. Janine was sitting on her bed wearing half of one of her usual white buttoned-down shirts with the other piece of my severed sweater sewn onto it to make up a complete shirt. She turned her hands out, palms up splaying her fingers. Two fingers on her left hand were bleeding. She had a little bit of red and gray smeared smudges on both hands and some red ones near the stitching where the two cut pieces of clothing met. She wore thickly smeared lipstick on her lips with a lot of redness outside of the lip-line. Her eye shadow looked like ink blotches sitting on her eyelids. Her face looked like a clown's. Her glasses sat on her computer-desk.

"How come you're not wearing glasses," I asked a little gape-mouthed.

"I just want to talk to you, Claudia," she said a little sheepishly.

"Uh, is that MY sweater you have as the bottom part of your shirt?" I interrupted.

She turned towards where her glasses were, then reached out and touched the frame, rubbing them with interest.

"I've seen you cut up shirts before and sew the pieces together to create a top for an outfit," she explained nervously. "I wanted to try it."

"But why?" I asked to the side of her face.

"Well . . . . to be more like you," she finished then added. "I thought that since Mimi passed on that we could become closer. As sisters. I know that's what she would've wanted."

She let out a big sigh and slouched her shoulders. "I'm trying to do my part."

"But you can't just go around mutilating other people's clothes. It's my property!" I exclaimed. "I know you would know about private property."

"I'm well aware of personal property laws and philosophies in common law countries such as ours and how I'm in violation of some of the statutes pertinent here," she replied then stopped but added with a linger. "But . . . "

I know Janine doesn't have very many friends which would entail that she's socially awkward to some degree but still. I wanted to lash out but saw that what Janine was saying was the bigger picture here so I tried a different tact.

"We could hang out," I ventured, softening. "And . . . you could always ask for my help with make-up."

She turned around facing me and laughed. So I laughed too.

"And I know that we could have fun together," she said smiling with raised eyebrows hinting at something.

"What are you talking about?" I demanded. "Is there something that I should know about?"

"All I know is that I know that I could get you to enjoy my company," she insinuated.

I paused a bit and turned over and over in my mind a suspicion that just dawned on me.

"You know we could get in trouble if we hung out too late," I threw out.

"Hmmm. You don't say," she gave me.

"Did Jerry give you roses and take you out for pizza a lot," I tried. "Like is that you two's go-to place when you guys want to unwind?"

"Mm, no. We don't go anywhere to take breaks. We usually just study at the library then he takes me home," she replied.

"Oh? I've passed by Pizza Express many times. For the past few weeks, I've often seen his car parked there. Did you guys get back together?"

"Noo," she said biting down.

I looked at her with my lips taut.

She looked thoughtful for a moment, let out an audible exhale then spoke. "Look, Claudia. Yeah. I didn't mean to lead you on. I just wanted to show you that I could be fun."

"So you ARE Bugs Bunnyyy!" I blurted out.

"Yes," she confirmed. "But you aren't hurt by it, are you? I didn't mean to if you are."

I snarled my lips in front of clenched teeth then stalked out of her room.

* * *

The next day, my friends and I were at our usual lunch table. They were brimming with excitement.

"Let's compare notes," Kristy said. "Did anybody find out anything?"

"Well, neither Alan Gray nor Cokie has a Bugs Bunnyyy as a friend. Out of everybody in SMS, only Bruce and Andi has a friend named that. They have the same friend but the person only has two y's," contributed Mary Anne, looking disappointed.

"Yeah. I was at Argos and Pizza Expreess for a couple of hours each and only saw Kara using her Facebook. She was chatting with Sabrina using the PM," Stacey relayed her findings looking a little put out.

"Yea, I didn't find anything either," Kristy said. "Geez, Claud. Don't worry. We'll get to the bottom of this."

"Is this an official mystery?" asked Mary Anne unsure.

I cut off Kristy as she started to say something. "Look guys. The mystery is solved," I let them know.

"Who was it?" Stacey perked up.

"Um, it was Trevor Sandbourne. He wanted to get back together to give us a try again," I lied.


End file.
